To many fucking years wasted, trying so hard to fi |
At first, all I wanted was to be liked by everyone, and for guys to find me attractive.
Then, when I worked my ass of to that point where I obviously did ‘fit in’, was seen as attractive and ‘kind of’ liked by people (you can never please everybody), all I still wanted to do was to hide myself from the world.
All of a sudden I didn’t wanted anyone to see me as a potential partner.
All I wanted was to be left the fuck alone, because I came to realize that people only cared about how I looked, people only wanted me because of the way I looked on the outside, no one really bothered to get to know me.
Nobody that crossed my path at that time of my life actually cared.
We’re talking years.
To many fucking years wasted, trying so hard to fit in that I actually lost myself in the process.
It made me questioning how humans actually work, think, feel?
Do the majority of them even feel something for someone else than themself?
It made me doubt humanity more then what I already did.
And that was a lot!
So I changed, again.
And now, when I’ve reached that point where I’m not ‘accepted’ by societys beauty standards and guys don’t “hit” on me almost every day, I STILL WANNA FUCKING SHRINK MYSELF INTO A FUCKING NOTHINGNESS!!!
Like WTF bitch!?
You’re never satisfied?
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